To kick things off, #Brabus has coaxed a stupefying 800 horsepower from the Merc’s already excellent 4.0-litre V8. That’s 789bhp, in Ye Olde English horsepower, or exactly as much as you get from a Ferrari 812 Superfast. Which is everything it says on the tin.

With so much power straining at the bonnet’s shut lines, you’d expect some compelling performance figures. Or at least a very imminent and quite spectacular meeting of irresistible forces and immovable objects. But, assuming you have the space – and strength of conviction – necessary, you can hit 62mph in 4.1 seconds from a standing start and batter air out of the way at up to 149mph.

Yes, we’re talking about shifting more than two and a half tonnes of brutalist architecture from rest to the single-carriageway speed limit in less time than it takes a #MaseratiGranturismo. As for the seemingly modest top speed – perhaps the only modest aspect of this towering leviathan – it’s electronically limited “due to the high vehicle weight”. Water is wet, flames are hot and #GClasses are heavy and probably shouldn’t travel at 160mph.

It’ll surprise literally no one to find out that Brabus’s method for screwing another 212bhp from #Mercedes’ already brawny V8 is to replace Merc’s pair of turbos with their own, beefier ones with larger compressors. These shove air in at 1.6bar, or a bit over 23PSI, resulting in McLaren Senna-equalling power and the same torque you get from Merc-AMG’s dearly departing twin-turbo V12: 737lb ft.